Space Chances
by Tsuki Doriimaa
Summary: Three people, many feelings. Two of them tied in an unknown twist.. Heero is starting to understand things now. He feels things for two others, yet doesn't know excatly what. Can he find out before it's too late? Or will other actions lead to his finding
1. Chapter 1: Wars End

~ Space Chances ~  
  
By: Anime Redneck  
  
8-11-03  
  
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Archive: If you've got the OK to snag my stuff, then please do! If you don't, then please ask me before you take this one! I'd like to know where these are skipping off to if anywhere heh ^_^  
  
Pairings: it'd give it away wouldn't it, but if you have to know... 2+1, 5+1  
  
Warnings: I was told it's kinda Angsty.. so Angst, sadness.. some goofyness somewhere, I'm sure of it! I can't write total Angst unless it's a deathfic.  
  
Disclaimers: Ah donno own tha Guys! Ah donno own "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler whenever ah git ta playin' wit it! heh Ah own meh truck an' tha plot, and ye canna 'ave 'em! ^_^  
  
Notes: Alrighty then! Now that's that's outta the way. I find it rather oddly amusing that I got threatened with an "Omae o koruso" if I didn't write up another 1x5x1.. by someone with the same name (minus a letter) as the title to my 1x2x1 site page! ::laughs grinnin':: So, inlight of said nicely, funny threat, and new ideas, I have put fourth a new chapter to a new story! Just chulk this up with the other what? Twenty-five or so I have going now? ^_^;;  
  
I've actually had the idea for playing this song in with a story for a long time now. Well last night before bed it came on the radio and bit me in the ass with ideas on how to actually USE it! This, is the result. I hope you like it!  
  
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~oOo@oOo~  
  
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It was cold.  
  
Unbearably cold in Space.  
  
Outside the expanse of bright twinkling stars floated amongst the blackness that was space. All of it a deadly vacuum... all of it enough to freeze a man in so many hours... all of it enough to kill any living thing stupid or misfortunate enough to wonder in it without their space suites. And yet... despite all the damage it could do to a living being...  
  
It was still quite very beautiful.  
  
There was something majestic about such a dangerous beautify that called to the small, slim, young man gazing out of the large observation window with suspiciously dark, shinny orbs. Something that reminded him of someone else... Someone for which, was just as capable of killing another in so odd many ways, it would make ones head spin... And then... still there was a beauty around the special young man that he seemed not to notice.  
  
How was this possible?  
  
Did the other not know, with his dark widely spun locks, piercing, upturned blue eyes, that angular face with just a hint of soft curves... the same face whose looks could possible kill on a semi-good day, the same wondrous features, that, while asleep, looked so much younger and vulnerable?!  
  
How was it that this young man did not see such beauty in himself? Was he trained so much to be a soldier that his sense of self worth - a truly moronic question - was washed away? Did he not notice that his skin (not unlike his own if a shade or so lighter) was tanned just right? That the muscles standing out on his being were smooth with their roundness... giving everyone the impression this man was someone you did not wish to mess with. Yet, at the same time, also counteracted that impression with his small size and compact body, showing someone that might be easily taken over... heh little did anyone know this special young man could take down anyone three times his size.  
  
A gross misconception, it would seem at first, had he not seen it with his very eyes.  
  
Shifting in his spot, drawing one knee up to his chest, looping arms around it, the other laid straight before him the young man leaned back more into the supporting wall behind him, emitting a small sigh.  
  
What could he do? His heart, his soul, so wanted to reach out, embrace and help the other see what he possessed, yet lacked in noticing anything but his Soldier side. If the scientists had not already been blown to Hades with the rest of Libra, he would have been hard pressed on seeking out this Dr. J fellow and make him see the light of Death for his evil, out worldly training of the deep feeling Japanese boy.  
  
This all coming from a man (in mind and soul if not body) who thought himself unworthy of being with anyone else. Unworthy of trying to help others when it seemed he could not help himself. He failed his colony... had failed to protect his child-wife - who appeared so much stronger then him! She wanted to fight! To protect their colony! While he, the small, scrawny Scholar, had merely wanted to stay away, to read and observe all he could. He had no wishes to fight, had no want for blood on his hands... however in all of this 'not wanting'; there was a very strong protective side which screamed to fight also! To protect that which was his! Join his wife, join his Clan members! Fight!  
  
But he did not. Could not.  
  
His soul in those times was fragile, young... grudgingly admitting also, scared. He had not the will to pick up a sword to fight the enemy. He had a will to protect his wife, his family, himself. But jumping into an enormous mobile suite and taking on hundreds of thousands of soldiers, who thought they were fighting for the right things? To take those semi-innocent lives, of people who were only doing as they were ordered? This was something his soul could not have withstood back in those days...  
  
Now, gazing out into the inky blackness, alone in the large observation room... the Oriental young man knew there was much he could stand up to now. The loss of his colony, the loss of his child-wife... had created a hole in his chest, where his life muscle pumped. There was little left he could possibly *not* compete with. And make it out alive.  
  
There was one thing. Only one person whom, could probably hurt him... though they would never know it. Not as long as h- spiiss!   
  
Turning a sharp eye, barely straining in the darkness of space, what little light came in from the moon's light, the boy sitting on the observation's window stayed still as another short, well defied form entered the room, his sanctuary since the end of the last war.  
  
Waiting for the doors to open, thinking them taking mildly longer then necessary, the dark figure entered the room. Bright eyes, thanks to reflecting the bare light within the room, scanned, searching for the one person who had not been accounted for after the wars end. A part of him, still strong from the latest fight, scanned it as if an unknown soldier would snap into being to kill him. Silently he berated himself. It was over! That was the last time he needed to kill anyone... Never again!  
  
Catching the young man his whole being seemed to know better then himself, the slight young man started forward again, slowly, he did not wish to startle the other - though that would not have been easy in the doing. He knew the other knew he was there from the instance the bulk door slid open. Still, even he, was keyed up from their final battle, best to keep his rapid pace under control this time. It would do him well to learn control over his walk, so he did not appear to be... Stalking... all over the place as his best friend? had put it.  
  
"Chang" he greeted the sitting young man in a near soft voice, gazing from the bleak, blinking stars outside, and back again, eying the window bench.  
  
Lips giving an idle twitch at the smooth baritone like voice, almond eyes turned upwards, looking over the blue jean clad, green tank toped boy. Small to large bruises here or there could be found, mainly around his shoulders, where his pilot chair harnesses would have settled, biting into his skin as Wing Zero rocked from the blasts of the underground mansion, and it's own kick back... while tearing itself apart trying to bring down the "impenetrable mansion". There were cuts, some small and shallow, one on his left shoulder had stitches, and another on one smooth, high cheekbone carried more.  
  
"Yuy" he greeted back, lips tugging a bit more as he motioned to the other half of the seat for his friend to sit. He would not admit it, to anyone, least of all at this moment... that watching as Wing Zero's internal skeleton was revealed, shot by shot, had scared the mighty, brave, pilot of Altron - his Nataku.  
  
When Wing Zero had shot it's second, and fatally, last shot... two screams rang out from the ground, at different points. Later he was startled, hearing, seeing, the Gundam corpse's great impact with the ground - that one of the voices screaming in terror - was his own.  
  
Nodding curtly, a habit he was forever doomed with (or so he thought for the time being) the Japanese pilot took the offered seat, grateful to get his slight weight off his feet. "Arigatou."  
  
He wasn't sure why he had sought out the other Asian boy... They had a many great things in common; things neither would fess up to anytime soon, but there nonetheless. There was something... different... about Altron's pilot that drew him close, made him observe and file away information about him. Chang Wufei made for an interesting study - like himself he was sure - and for an even better friend, to have watching your back.  
  
However, even with knowing all that he did, being in all the battles with the other as he had, Heero could still not untangle why, what, made him seek the Chinese pilot out so often. He himself, had the talkative American, right? So why did he seek another's company when he was feeling... off? Sad? Worried? He was not sure what he was feeling at the moment besides an unnamed restlessness, and tired... oh so tired... He should sleep, he knew. Duo was waiting, already asleep in their shared quarters, but he could not. Something kept him awake. Kept him from Sleeps calm embrace.  
  
Letting out a near silent stream of air, something that passed as a sigh for Heero, he leaned his unruly head against the cool, cold, glass, emptying his mind of the confusing thoughts - content to watching the other's reflection in the glass, mirrored by the twinkling stars.  
  
The air changed. Shifted from the quiet calm, to a calm stillness, still quiet but with an overlay of something else... something which only the Wing pilot carried with him, added in with the 'something' else, the stillness of something being wrong.  
  
Heero was hurting. It did not take a scientist to comprehend this new feeling, only a matter of seconds for it to clip onto the right nerve in Wufei's mind. Tilting his head, watching the other through his glass reflection as Heero was doing to him, he waited. The stitches were not likely causing any sort of pain for the near stoic boy; something that small was inconsequential to him. The bruises were likely to be getting the same treatment, hardly causing pinpricks of discomfort.  
  
Whatever was hurting him was inside.  
  
Hesitating a moment, a motion that did not show in his voice, "Heero, are you well?"  
  
The other was quiet tonight. This should not have surprised Heero; Wufei was never really a talker, as was himself, unless something needed to be said. But he worried... Was this worry? he mentally wondered. This feeling in his chest, a feeling, near pain, which tightened at the thought of leaving and never seeing the others (at least for long periods of time) again? Never seeing Chang Wufei again?  
  
What was it about the Chinese pilot from the no longer L5 Colony, last known heir to the Dragon Clan? What was it that pulled these unknown emotions out of him? Over the last two years he had opened up, albeit a little, to the others - to himself. Had learned with help from everyone - regardless if they knew it or not - to put names to some of the things he felt at times. Emotions were nothing something he was familiar with. Not something he was used to contending with. Dealing with. They were new, hard, and at times... like now, perhaps... made him worry.   
  
Heero Yuy did not like worrying... it made him feel... anomalous.  
  
He had spent the first year trying to keep everyone away from him - No distractions. Duo Maxwell had spent that first year trying to get him "out of his shell" and "into the world of the living" for his own good or so the braided one said. Chang Wufei had spent that year watching them all, learning, trying to get them to work together as a team - showing them the right paths in which to take.  
  
Quatre R. Winner, the loving Arabian, had spent it trying to teach them all the strategic advantages of working together, in teams, as one large team - leading them when Heero could not. Trowa Barton, had been a helper to them all, invaluable in his tricks and ways, always a silent beam of support or comfort when it seemed things were going down hill and even the rambunctious American could no longer keep his spirits up.  
  
Sometime between the end of the first war and the slight, almost nonexistent peacetime they had before the second one - Heero had come to the conclusion; all four of the Gundam pilots were his friends - his family. Quatre's batting it into his head, along with Duo's helped also. He had come to realize, that, without the others, he was not whole. They were each apiece of a larger puzzle. A puzzle called life - one in which when you collected all five pieces; you had a tight nit family.  
  
Admittedly one with many strange, deadly quirks - but a family nonetheless. Heero smirked a little at that thought. A family with forty overly protective protectors, most of which were old enough to be their fathers, or nearly old enough, he supposed. Forty fathers and five kids, right? They could've been on that ancient show Duo was always babbling about... what was it again? Ripley's Believe It or Not?  
  
"Heero?" Leaning forward minutely, onyx pools peered into the deep blue of Heero's reflected eyes, a pair he could directly look into. He was becoming worried now, when the other did not answer his question. The Japanese had a knack for answering immediately, if not a second or so later. What was he thinking about? Wufei wondered, tipping his just so much more to the side, waiting patiently. Heero was not a man of many words, neither was himself, so he would not push him along. If the other so decided to answer, he would, in his own time.  
  
Shaking his head a little, turning slightly, bright cobalt eyes peered into midnight. "Hai?" his voice low, an almost unheard of softness within the rich, baritone depths.  
  
"Are you well, Heero?"  
  
Was he? heh In a sarcastic way, he supposed it depended on the other's view of 'well'. But he knew, knew what Wufei had meant and he wanted to say 'Fine', his usual response... but he couldn't, something in those onyx depths, refused him, kept him from automatically answering without giving it honest thought.  
  
Heero supposed, in a way, he was 'fine', was 'well'... and yet, in his other hand, he was not. He knew they were leaving soon, they all were, had places to go, something to do... Most of them did anyhow. He didn't, he was only going with Duo because he liked the boy, and... and Duo seemed to want him... honestly cared for the reckless Japanese from L1... He had nowhere else to go... No one else seemed to want him... So why not go with the hyperactive American? Was it not better then doing nothing? Feeling abandoned and lonely?  
  
Of course, his mind battled over this single question also. It appeared to him, every question which flew through his mind was snatched up, observed, discussed and fought over to find the correct answer possible... Never could he just answer it... It was never that simple for him... He wondered if he would ever be able to decide something without some internal debate over it. His Humanity and Soldier sides conflicting - The Soldier, usually winning... Humanity didn't have a chance alone, not with the training he had been put through...  
  
So why on his other hand, when he thought about leaving with Duo, did he worry? What was the worry for? Was he worrying about something, or someone? Himself maybe? It was driving him "up the wall" not to know... making him almost, sick, in trying to plot it all out. Why did his chest tighten when the thought of the others being away from him... more so when he thought of his Asian counterpart? What was it about Wufei being alone when they left, that put him on edge? Would he ever figure it out?  
  
Giving another small shake of his head, eyes trained on the soft, caring ones of Wufei's, who tried hard to mask his true feelings... and had it been anyone but Heero watching him, he might have seceded; Prussian blues seemed to droop a bit, their lids closing for a second as his mouth answered for him, "Iie" barely a whisper.  
  
Frowning at the others continued silence, mind running through possible reasons, suggestions, and crossing half of them out, Wufei put a gentle, cautious, hand on the other's shoulder, giving a slight squeeze at Heero's answer of no. Wufei knew, sensed it, if it was not a knowing of something within his own self, that to answer truthfully of not being well, and hinting with tone that one did not know why... took a great deal of strength and trust.  
  
Neither of them were public people. They took great pains in keeping to themselves, trying to keep others out for whatever reasons. To openly admit that you were not well, was something to be seen as special... to know the other trusted you enough to go that far, to give that much information away.  
  
Taking in a soft breath, hand tightening a little on that slim muscled shoulder, the Chinese pilot went out on a limb of pure trust.   
  
Moving forward his other hand stretched out slowly, carefully closing around Heero's bicep on his left arm, gently tugging him backwards with both hands, always attentive at each move, being careful of his injuries, and his honed pride and senses; he did not in any way, wish to put the other ill at ease... He could sense though, that the overly quiet man-teen needed this... maybe even as much as he himself needed it.  
  
Within moments he held a tensed Heero Yuy, back snug against his chest; his tanned arms locked softly around the other's slim waist, squeezing with what he hoped was a comforting amount of pressure.  
  
Heero's eyes remained closed in silent wonder of what the other would think of him, and why it mattered? Would the Chinese honor-bound Justice seeker,* see him as weak? Did his voice give way to not understanding why he was feeling off inside? Out of everyone he had come acquainted with over the years... Who did he mostly 'get along' with?  
  
Was there a difference between getting along with someone and someone else being your 'best friend', instead of just a friend? What separated those three from one another? Was there a boundary he was not aware of yet? He could call every one of the pilots his friends, his best friends, even brothers. Truthfully, brothers would be what they are - together making up their family. Heero knew what you considered someone, was based on how much you liked, or disliked him or her. But where did you draw the line for one or the other? Was there a diagram somewhere with standards listed on how one should feel?  
  
Friends... Best friends... Brothers...  
  
In the beginning, he considered them all problems, obstacles in his way to be over come, or until they were proven otherwise. Later, slowly, they became an oddball asserted group of allies... Even later still, they kept growing on him. Little things. Quatre's kind heart, his strategic knowledge; Trowa's quiet comfort, his strong support; Duo's endless chatter that kept him from getting his complete soul wrapped up in mission data which would have torn him apart, his friendly nature that tried it's damnedest to draw out the 'human' in him...  
  
These were all his friends, his brothers... If he had to pick, then Duo was his best friend and brother. He was the one pulling the Human from the Soldier's imposing shadow... He was the single person that stood by him in everything, even when Heero decided the "only way out" was a Kamikaze move.  
  
Heero stiffened suddenly as another hand clamped down, lightly, on his arm, tugging him back almost as if wary of what would happen for trying.  
  
He could resist, but what was the use? Wufei would sooner or later get his way... he usually did. The remembered notion brought a small, nearly unseen smirk to his finely curved lips.  
  
Chang Wufei, Dragon Clan heir... last of the L5 Colony... and possibility the most stubborn of them all - aside from himself of course. If there was something in which needed to be carried out, Wufei would do it, no matter how difficult. If perchance, one of them needed a certain item and could not find it... it had a way of appearing the next day, unknown as to how it got into their quarters. At other times, Heero could remember the Chinese pilot "ripping into" one of the others for a particularly stupid stunt. Or "letting them have it" (to adopt another of Duo's phrases) when their self worth value was rapidly dropping. That one, however, was rarely seen to happen in front of others but the one it was intended for.  
  
Heero knew, in some uncanny way, despite all the non-caring, "hard ass" masks Wufei seemed to wear - he cared deeply for those of his team, his new family. Perhaps though, it was not an uncanny way of knowing, maybe it was just the same sort of mask Heero himself wore: To protect himself, and protect others. A mask of un-shown caring, of action being carried out which held more meaning to either one then they were willing to let others see into.  
  
Letting out a quiet puff of air, watching as it's misty form flashed in the dim room, Heero forced himself to relax in the others arms. He trusted this young man, with his life, or more... There was no danger in staying as the other bid, no harm in stealing some of Wufei's body heat for himself...  
  
Idly, a thought hit him...  
  
If Duo was his best friend and brother... and Quatre and Trowa his friends and brothers... Then... What did that make Chang Wufei?  
  
The sensation of being in his arms riled something within him he had not felt before... it confused him, yet warmed him also... What was this new feeling? Oh he knew some of what his feelings told him: Secure, Safe, Warm, and Protected... He needn't worry when encircled in the warm arms around him... Wufei would protect him... like always...  
  
It was Wufei's greater qualities... the small ones... The ones barely shown outside of his personal space, his quarters... Though the Japanese pilot knew, unsure of how he had become aware to these small traits... just that somewhere along the way, he had stumbled into a special place many never saw.  
  
With Wufei it was not what he said or even what he did most of the time that counted to Heero... It was what he didn't say, what he didn't do (in the open at least). The little things, small jesters many would have over looked, that he noticed...  
  
Heero recalled a few memories from his mental log of being frustrated beyond his points, wanting to smash something to bits, mainly at times, his laptop... then to have a warm, slightly callused hand dropped on his should, squeezing lightly before the main body moved away. Or the times like it when Green Tea was offered as a "cool down" though it was not said... After a mission gone astray, the kind look in Wufei's doe eyes of understanding, support... heh The little items which seemed to appear in his room as if by magic, when he could not find them himself... the silent wall of strength, comfort and understanding that always seemed to be there for him to unconsciously draw off of...  
  
Heero Yuy was not perfect...  
  
He had also come to believe, understand, he could not live alone. Should not have to. He had family now.  
  
He understood this, after two long, hellish years.  
  
Reaching up uncertainly, hesitating a moment, Heero brought his hands to his waist, cupping them, holding onto the pair circling his waist comfortingly, like his life line in the dark... to a world he was no longer alone in... before closing his eyes, giving up the fight they had bravely been trying to have for him to sleep...  
  
For three hours, lying in bed, and not sleeping, not knowing why... He still did not know why... But here, in these arms... He could finally rest...  
  
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~ * ~  
  
'  
  
In the doorway shadowed by the darkness and outside light barely flickering into the night, moon lit observation room, stood a figure. Shoulder leaning against the doorframe, one leg crossed over the other lazily and his arms folded over his chest. If anyone could see his shadow paled features, they would see a sad smile gracing his tiers.  
  
It was a beautiful, if something of a heartrending sight sitting before him now.  
  
Two dark headed youths, so much alike, yet so different from one another, seeming to hold onto the other for all they're worth. Dark chocolate hair swayed with each gentle pass of a long fingered hand, smoothing back the wild locks while their owner slept peacefully, for once, in the strong, lean arms wrapped around him.  
  
The Dragon, bless his beating heart, looked as content as they'd ever seen him before. He looked near... happy... holding the Wing pilot as he was, gently stroking his hair every few moments... eyes closed, his whole form, just pulsating: relaxed.  
  
It saddened the observing figure greatly, to see each one so content to be where they were... to have forgotten, just for the time being, a war was won not three hours back by them five... It was heartrending because... No matter how much they may have felt at peace with one another......  
  
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~ * ~  
  
'  
  
It was quiet in this room, Wufei thought, opening his eyes briefly to glance at the one he held. It was peaceful... for once since this whole damned war had started - The Eve Wars - he felt at peace...  
  
That both warmed him with a tingling feeling he had not known in seeming ages... and scared him...  
  
No matter what this might mean to him, the lonely Dragon... It could not remain...  
  
Sighing, running one last hand through the wildly soft hair, he let his head sink back against the bulky wall behind him, a lone thought passing through his mind before Sleep claimed him also...  
  
Heero was leaving with Duo in the morning...  
  
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~oOo~ * ~oOo~ * ~oOo~ * ~oOo~  
  
'  
  
* Alright, don't no one take that the wrong way about Fei. I know we all (or most) call him a "Justice raving" something or another at some point, but that's not what I'm puttin' 'im as in this one. It's just supposed to be a goofy name Duo came up with for 'im. Nuttin' more!  
  
Okies, So everyone like? Yes? No? PLEASE let me know what ya think! It's one of my rare "actually nearly all planned out and not flown by the seat of her pants" stories! lol I really do have near all of it planned out, just the ending is open, even if I know how it ends. BUT please review, lemme know! I love feed back!  
  
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Keep it kickin'!  
  
~ Anime Redneck  
  
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The Certifiable Songfic Queen  
  
Warai no Megami  
  
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	2. Chapter 2: Changes

~ Space Chances2 ~  
  
By: Anime Redneck  
  
8-13-03 ~ 8-18-03  
  
'  
  
Archive: If you've got the OK to snag my stuff, then please do! If you don't, then please ask me before you take this one! I'd like to know where these are skipping off to if anywhere heh ^_^  
  
Pairings: it'd give it away wouldn't it, but if you have to know... 2+1, 5+1  
  
Warnings: I was told it's kinda Angsty.. so Angst, sadness.. some goofyness somewhere, I'm sure of it! I can't write total Angst unless it's a deathfic.  
  
Disclaimers: Ah donno own tha Guys! Ah donno own "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler! heh Ah own meh truck an' tha plot, and ye canna 'ave 'em! ^_^  
  
"~Lyrics~"  
  
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~ ^*^ .@. ^*^ ~  
  
Chapter Two: Changes  
  
~ ^*^ .@. ^*^ ~  
  
'  
  
Earth.  
  
It was different. Fresh. Took some time to adjust to after living on a colony all your life. Missions down to Earth were a rarity, something I've learned over the course of a short time not to take for granted. Maybe Duo and Quatre's prodding of my Human side had something to do with the change - though one could never come forward to say it happened 'suddenly'. Nothing in my life is that easy. If it were...  
  
Shaking my head I turn my gaze skyward, taking in the sights around me, the place we've lived (Duo and myself) for the last near half a year now.  
  
Chicago, Earth.  
  
A place Duo has told me time and again he choose for us to live because it reminded him of his 'old town' - aka Colony L2, the roughest parts. I have thanked whoever would listen many times, that he had the common sense not to pick a particular part of Chicago, which resembled L2 Colonies roughest parts. No doubts linger in my mind that we could not have taken them on... It wouldn't be the slightest problem... but I do not wish to damage anyone else... The wars are over... let peace reign, everywhere...  
  
Sometimes, when I walk around like this, no particular destination in mind... an oddity, I admit now. I wonder - What the hell I'm doing here?  
  
I catch my mind leaving me at times, walking down paths that have never much been ventured before... find myself wondering if anyone else besides me has this question running around in their minds. Do people wonder why they're somewhere? What purpose they have in life?  
  
As a former Gundam pilot, this often runs through my tangled brain. I was brought up to know war, to live war, to end war. Ironically enough, I have, and here I still am, trying to fit into the 'normal' way of life.  
  
It's not as unproblematic as some would think. The saying, 'Easier said then done' comes to mind quite often.  
  
I have a job here, not as a Preventer though that position is open always to me if I should ever wish to take it. They're always looking for the best the war had, for people who can't seem to settle into the way life should be without a war. I suppose it's a rather comforting thing to know... that solders are not merely being thrown away into the hectic hell some call life, outside of war. But that place is not for me.  
  
Taking a seat at the Preventers isn't something I have not thought about - quite the contrary; I've thought about it many times. Shuffling around the office, sitting behind a desk, is not something I could do... Gomen, that in itself is not correct. I *could* do it, if I had to... yet it is not something I *want* to do. Fieldwork would suit me excellently; on one hand, anyway. Then there's the other where people have a chance to die in the field... something I neither wish to do, or cause. Harming someone is the coins completely other side - I would have no problem harming a person in self defense or, if - No, I guess self defense is all there would be in the field if they retaliated, ne?  
  
Anomalous thoughts to be coming out of Heero Yuy's head, ne?  
  
I believe if I were more 'outgoing' I would chuckle and smile at that. They are some particular thoughts, but the truths nonetheless. I have done away with those days... I don't want to kill. I don't want to be a part of any sort of military units. They bring back memories, which are better left in the darker pits of forgetful places in my being.  
  
Have I mentioned we've been here half year? That I've only been able to see the others on vidcoms or when Quatre's business brings him to Earth? Not too long ago it wouldn't have seemed that long... but now, just living with Duo... it seems to have stretched, yawned into an eternity; with no likely clue why that is...  
  
Earth is different from the colonies. Everything here is sharper, fresher; the storms bring in a distinct crisp smell on their frigid winds, the rain and lightening and thunder that no colony in space could every hope to recreate captures my attention every time the shows come. It's a new experience whenever it happens; no one is the same, and that's what I find... fascinating, about them... I think.  
  
When we first arrived here, Duo started showing me - or attempted to - the "small things" in life that made it all worth living... Somehow I find myself believing I've only managed to capture half of what he was trying to show me - the love of storms being one of those things. It's impossible to take in everything one might have to show you and understand it all right away as to why it's so captivating, why they would make you want to live longer... If pushed, I will grudgingly admit, some of those things... have become somewhat of a... advantage, to have noticed.   
  
So little things are able to bring people a sense of peace, if only for a little while... without my friends - my family - I might never have realized this.  
  
Moving into the two bedroom apartment in mid-upscale Chicago, with Duo, I won't say was a... a brilliant idea... maybe at the time it was a convenient idea? It's hard to say, from that time to now, what I was exactly thinking. I don't understand things still at times... There are moments when I have doubts, where... where there was another path I could have taken; as with Zero showing me the future... There appear to be many paths, and you can only take one... Other times, I think it was the correct thing to do... Often then not lately, I've my doubts.  
  
Duo Maxwell is a charismatic young man. He loves all around him, loves everything near him... Everything seems to mean something to him... Not much that I've taken note of appears to be able to bring him down from his high on life. I personally, would never try... a time or two just to get his head out of the clouds, but... it almost seems that's where he belongs. Is there a place anywhere, Earth or Space, which he does not belong?  
  
Now and then, perhaps all your life, there are times when you cannot help but credit something or another to someone... Someone that comes along and shows you something, gives you a gift, which, later in life, would come to mean the world to you... There will always be a person there to share something. I have realized this in the last year - more so in the half that I've lived with Duo.  
  
I trust I have much to credit to this young man. Naming the things, small or large, would in all likelihood, take near forever, so I don't attempt it. But I do owe him much... A lesser man would say they owe nothing to anyone... I don't consider myself above anyone, far from it... sighing, I suppose I shouldn't say anything of a 'lesser' man... then again, Duo would whap me upside the head for thinking it, let alone saying something about it...  
  
Duo...  
  
Taking in the night's fading sky, I wonder where he would be at this moment. On his way home, I know, but where? Could he passing 109th Street? Maybe crossing on to Smitson Dr.? It's anyone's guess, let alone mine, where the braided fool would be on his way home... His path changes you see... I think he can't forget something from his childhood - something he's had a time with - and continues to replay parts from it. However this is only one young man's guess on another.  
  
Duo "Shinigami" Maxwell...  
  
Turning down Blossomer St, cutting up to Tenshi'sKeep, shaking my head I enter the downstairs parlor of our apartment complex, already knowing I've beaten him here, from wherever he is.  
  
Over the last year, Duo has changed... A slight occurrence, which lately, has been catching my eye, my senses more and more. I don't know when it started, possibly a few months before now... Recalling and reviewing my memories not, it seems likely. By some means, I can't seem to bring up what the first clue was to his behavioral changing. This doesn't sit well with me. A few things don't really, but... not remembering a single change, a single shift in my koibito's life which, spared others is a happening perhaps others would not like not remembering as well, ne?  
  
In any case. We have - or should I say had? - a good life together. For a while, I suppose it was 'great'... Only life I've really ever known outside of the Wars, would be the best I could (or not) imagine. Sometime after moving into the sixth floor suit, buying new furniture - which was hell in itself! You have no idea what shopping with Duo Maxwell is like... How many stores you get tugged around to regardless if you absolutly needed to visit them or not... heh Child at heart is what he shall ever be. I have to admit though; it was fun watching him bounce around as if on a sugar high with ants following him around. It' s an amusing sight... maybe, perhaps even; Wufei would have laughed a little at it...  
  
Once we settled in, Duo found a job at a local high school teaching gym class. Fitting for him, really. It's a chance to be around others his age, teach them things, have a sort of 'childhood' outside the only one he's ever known. Let not Ares above forget that those kids have more in common with Duo then any in our family - if you subtract the whole fighting in the Eve Wars bit that is. It also gives him a chance to stay in shape, not that some other... things... don't present themselves a form of helping his shape that is. And he enjoys it. I can't pick out many memories from the Wars, or his telling of the past but a few, that he actually seemed to enjoy...  
  
I, on the other hand, stayed at home the first few months - just two, I believe... trying to collect and sort my thoughts, feelings, what I was going to do now. What job does a Soldier take on? Someone whose brain capacity would near literally blow away some people's minds with the amount I can do, and in a short period of time. Whose physical enhancements are more then a man of three hundred pounds, near nothing but muscle, could contend with? I'm small, but my size should not let anyone under guess my abilities. I can, and have, easily crushing things without meaning to; just by forgetting I possess more strength then the normal human being.  
  
It is a fact I tend to need to forget; if just to feel a bit human inside. Not an outcast.  
  
Needless to say, I eventually got a job working down at the docks. It is a pleasant chance of wonders, to have found, I suppose... I'm still not real sure which words to use at times to describe things... 'Pleasant', 'Wonderful', 'Nice'... which one would really be correct for this? I still have a lot to learn, even with all currently crammed into my head from training since I was four.  
  
The job however, with lack of the correct word usage, is a efficient one to have chosen. There's heavy lifting, plenty of walking, climbing... you do many physical things there that help to keep ones body in shape. I believe this is why there people I see everyday are there - I could be wrong, however, they all have near perfect builds... almost seeming as if they're training for something... Shaking my head I sigh, they might not, but then again... who am I to know?  
  
I've met a few guys then, men really... I don't know why I keep doing this... I guess, working/terrorizing during the war with mere kids my own age, I tend to leave off anything for people over my age. We're only seventeen years old, and yet... give us any sort of test and we'll prove we've a mind of an adult - if not passing some adults... I don't do the age thing, I don't really see it anymore unless someone I've sighted is near the later years... those people, the ones that look like 'Grandparents', tend to leave an odd softening, a warming of my chest for some reason... I have yet to discover why... But I'm switching carts here airn't I?  
  
At work, on the docks, there are a few guys I've taken to talking to, albeit a little. They don't seem to mind that I don't speak all that much, in fact; they seem pleased by it for a strange reason. Are children today really all that bad? Do they speak of things rather best kept to their own ages? Hn. This could be why... indeed; I do not speak of oddball happenings, the 'new groves' in town and what not. Frankly, I'm pleased I do not; I don't understand them - any of them.  
  
Sliding the key into the lock, striding quickly over to the sidewall shutting off the alarm system I throw my bag to the couch and make way into the kitchen for something to eat. I enjoy my job, the first I've ever had... and walking to and from work is nice, but I find I'm eating more now then I ever have. Still have yet to gain another pound though, so I can't complain, I guess. Duo seems to find it amusing. I haven't gathered why yet, probably never will... Ares knows I'm not going to ask him.  
  
Again, sitting with a newly made sandwich and drink, the question of 'Why the hell I'm here?' crosses my mind.  
  
So much has changed, and not all for the better - not in the last few months. Something is happening with Duo and I've yet to figure out what. It seems I have a lot to learn when it comes to figuring people out... Maybe some just weren't meant to be figured out, Duo could certainly be placed in this category. Then, on the other, it could just be me that can't be figured out. Shrug. Who knows? I certainly don't.  
  
When we first arrived here, it was 'all good', as Duo loves to say. We had a home, Duo had found a wonderful job he loved, kids he could have fun with and teach at the same time... Thinking of the problems, the mischief they all could combine into has kept me up some nights... Soon, very soon after settling in we became lovers. Something I had never expected - Ever. Least of all, I think, from him. I didn't see myself worthy. He was, is, too bright, too alive to be soiled by the likes of my gloomy darkness. Yet he came to me... I know he loves me, he's said as much many times - I can *feel* it.  
  
I feel for him, something strong, but I don't know what kind of love it is... Many times when alone I've slammed my fists into the walls around me, frustrated because there was something about me, something I felt and couldn't figure it out. I *do* love Duo. I do. But I also know, have learned over the years, there are different kinds of Loves... You've the parent and child love, a love for a friend, love for a sibling, and then real love... a love between you and a person you can't live without...  
  
This is what's effectively pissing me off! What the Hell am I feeling for Duo now!? Why in the name of the War God Ares, am I still here!? WHY!?  
  
Things have changed. Duo has changed... I still love him... Even with not knowing what exactly this love feeling is I hold for him, I know it would never change. At any rate, living without him? Hn. I believe it would be hard, harder then the Eve Wars perhaps... He was my light back then, still is now... but things change... I could live with him, I could damn well live without him, if need be... Sadly, when I think about it... It's looking that way real soon.  
  
Why the hell am I still here?  
  
If everything I've been feeling the last few months, everything I've been seeing and trying not to see, are correct... I should have been gone long ago. Duo would be all right; he can live through anything life throws at him...  
  
Standing, stretching to pop stiff joints, loosen muscles, I move to sit in my favorite leather chair in the corner. I've never had something that was truly mine, something I would never be without... if I had, this would be it... I think some people - the other guys, would smile and chuckle at me here... It's a wonderful chair though, honestly. You sit in it and the leather just seems to sink under you, tugging your form deeper and curling about you... I love my chair. Chuckling I shake my head humored at myself. Despite the sadness I know will grip me when I leave - there's no other way to stay - I'm taking my chair with me. I also love it because it's in a shadowed corner, you can't see me unless the lights are on; they're not.  
  
I've observed Duo over the course of ninety-three days since my first assumption something was wrong. Different. Not right. It started as a feeling of something being off... out of line. It was the night Duo came home late. Not something major, I suppose to others, yet when you have someone loved, that comes home later then the usual, when there's no other reason for them being at school late... you wonder. Possible he could've been hanging out with a few of the kids. Even I've thought of that, it's not all that uncommon... I guess. Honestly wouldn't know.  
  
There were other nights... nights he'd come in later then normal. School let out around three in the afternoon, he'd come home around six or seven those nights... What was he doing for those three to four hours afterwards? Do parents normally let their kids stay out that late on school nights, high school or not? Another thing I don't know.  
  
Then there were the days he would leave a little earlier in the mornings, get home a little later at nights, be a little more withdrawn... a little more distant... In the short years I've known Duo Maxwell I've never seen him - once - become withdrawn from a friend.  
  
"Luuuccy... I'm home!"  
  
Then there's me, whom he seemed to center around, constantly. What happened to him? To us? Once or thrice, I've had a thought pass by that he has grown tired of me. And maybe... that's not entirely the wrong idea. I'm sure it could happen... with someone as lively as him, with someone as devoid, unknowing of life, like me.  
  
"Heero?"  
  
I don't know what I would do now... if I choose to leave... or even how I should leave. I know there's not real set way on how one should... but I believe there's bound to be rules to this engagement... something one should follow while doing so. I just don't... I don't know what I want to do anymore... Being here is nice, and then, it's sad all the same... if that makes sense. Like I want to be here, yet I don't. My chest tightens at the thought of staying, and at the thought of leaving... I've been debating which one hurts the most; I've drawn no real conclusions.  
  
"Hey love, ya home?"  
  
I can hear him shuffling around in the darkness that need only a light to scare away. Duo likes it dark though, says his times on the streets and being a master of stealth helps with his night vision. I can't default him for that notion; I've seen the results more then once already. I don't call back to him; something keeps my mouth still, my mind running around in circles as it has the last few days.  
  
"Hee-love?"  
  
He's by the refrigerator now, if he only turned around while opening it, he might glimpse some part of me reclined in my chair; but he doesn't. There's something about his trusting his instincts that gets to me. Almost... almost as if he trusts them, then second-guesses them. That bothers me. One should always trust their instincts at first comings: they save your life more then not.  
  
"Heero? Heero I know you're here!"  
  
Of course you do, I want to say, but keep quiet. There's something about watching him fiddle around that's near amusing. I can't keep the smirk from crawling upon my lips while observing him. He knows the layout like the back of his hand, yet he's ramming into the table edge, spiking his foot a good one, I can just make out his shadowed form jumping around, yipping like an injured dog. I don't know why that amuses me... Perchance it's his stubbornness of just reaching out to turn on a light and see to walk that does it. More then not that's what it is I'm sure.  
  
"Heeeerroo!!" he whines now, reminding me of Relena.  
  
Getting up quietly from my seat I walk to the back of the apartment, gently opening and closing the door behind me. I have this feeling in my chest, telling me I shouldn't speak to Duo tonight... to just let him be, to go to sleep now and think, maybe dream some more... Then tomorrow... tomorrow things would change... How? I'm not really sure.  
  
You know I've lived my life from day to day, trusting in my emotions like my mentor, the only father figure I've really known, Oldin Lowe taught me... Doctor J wasn't a bad mentor either, a little "screwed up" in the brain on some fronts I think, but he took me in, taught me all I needed to know to survive and finish the wars... I'm, sad, that they're both gone... and thankful I had the chance to know them for the short time I did... But I cherish their advice. So I follow what my emotions, what my heart tells me. It tells me that tomorrow there will be a change... a change for the better hoping... a change that'll give life back into my weary existence.  
  
I had life here, for a good long while... now it seems I only exist. I can't say what I exist for though... Used to be it was the Wars... then for Duo... With Duo I was alive... Ah, I seem I've used pastence there... Now I'm just... Here. I wake up, go to work, eat lunch talking a little with the few people there that care, walk home, eat and sleep... sometimes when Duo's not distant, we share the night... but...  
  
Giving myself a mental shake I shuck out of the clothes I chose that morning, throwing them to one side of the bed, leaving me in my navy blue boxers and socks. Glancing around the room once, having an evilly good notion to lock the door... heh smirking I decide it wouldn't be nice, and crawl into bed, waiting, listening, for when the door will open, when Duo will slip in and try seeing if I'm really awake or not. He's tried many times before... there's only been twice when I couldn't fool him into believing I was asleep. He's a sharp kid, that Duo.  
  
"Hee-love...?" the quiet whisper comes moments later, footfalls softly shuffling along the thick carpet over to the bed. Then the mattress sinks, giving way to his bodies weight as he leans over lightly watching. I don't have to open my eyes to tell he's on his knees, arms crossed pillowing his chin on them, watching. I can feel his breath barely brush my cheeks, it's hard to stay still, to not reaching out and brush his long bangs from that beautiful face, but I keep from doing so. I've the urge to scoot over towards him, as I find myself doing at nights anyways, seeking out his bodies warmth and curling next to it.  
  
Whoever would have imagined that Heero Yuy, the once Perfect Soldier, liked to cuddle?  
  
A sigh, "Heero... What's goin' on buddy?" he asks. I want to ask the same thing, but again, something keeps me from saying anything at all, just taking deep, even breaths, to appear sleeping. I know he can't tell the difference between either at the moment, because one hand reaches out, almost carefully to sweep some of my bangs backwards, only to let them fall back into place again. "M'sorra love..." he say what for, doesn't say why he's sorry and it aches. Why is he sorry? What's been going on with him that he can't tell me?  
  
Heaving a sigh of my own, a purely natural one anyone asleep would let loose, I tilt my head into his hand now cupping my cheek. Somehow, even with all the questions scrolling along in my brain I can't be mad at him, I can't be angry... I know, maybe I should - others probably would. Nonetheless I can't. Duo has given me so much since the time I've known him, I don't deserve to be angry at him for something like this... I can only take in what he gives, hold it close, forever, no matter what happens.  
  
A change is coming... a change I both need, crave... and fear. A change I believe, in my heart, will take me away from him... Now, in the calmness of night, with Duo crawling in behind me, snuggling close... I know that wherever I go, he will always be with me... Like everyone else, he will forever be a part of me... and maybe... maybe this is what he needs too. Maybe he fears change also... Together we were stronger... then perhaps it could work in reverse, with us being apart, we could only get better...  
  
Sighing once more, this time contently, for whatever may come. I turn over, snuggling up to his chest, burring my head beneath his chin, feeling his arms wrap around me protectively. heh It's a strange notion that... Him protecting me... should be the other way around... yet as my eyes droop closed on their own, I can't help be feel a small bit grateful that someone is looking out for me this time...  
  
.  
  
~ * ~  
  
'  
  
I'm dreaming. It's an odd feeling, when one knows they're dreaming. Seeing something that could be so real, yet a place you've never been or seen.  
  
It's a wooded area, I notice spinning around to get my bearings, even if I don't know where I am. Greenish-brown grass beneath my feet, more green then brown, as if it had been dying then suddenly got a second wind of life springing back. There are trees, plenty of trees providing cover from the sun above. A little ways away I can see shimmering blue, as if a lake or small pond, more trees, bushes and benches.  
  
I'm in a park... a park or natural woodland, but that... that doesn't seem right. Looking up and over, straining my eyes sight I can pick out the tall rises of buildings further off... So I'm in a park, a nice one at that.  
  
I haven't a clue why I'm here, how my mind pictured up a swirling fountain some feet away of two children caught in mid run... the little boy in front has arms extended, a small ball of sorts captured between his little hands, his face is one of laughter, wearing overall shorts and small boots. The little girl, behind the boy has one arm extended as if trying to catch the other, her face mirroring that joy, her other hands reaching backwards, as if mid swing, her little knee length dress swirling around her, small cute looking strapped shoes on her feet. Around them each on the base of their small pedestal sprout shoots of water, arching halfway up their height then over and into the small pool below.  
  
Walking forward, closer, kneeling where a sparkle of metal has caught my attention I see a small plaque stating: Always Hope. Feeling a small smile tug at my lips I stand, nodding. There is always hope, one simply has to believe that... At times though it is not so easy to keep a hold on that hope. It slips away so easily.  
  
Frowning a little at that thought I turn away, looking for somewhere else to go. I can hear the laughter, cheers and voices of other people, people sounding like they're having a grand time at this park... and yet I see no one. A moment later I resist the urge to snap my head around as a little girls laughing voice runs straight past me, disappearing off into the distance beyond.  
  
Why am I here?  
  
Have I seen this place and just not remembered it? Was I younger and been here with Oldin? Maybe a place I visited before being transferred over into Doctor J's hands? I see that even if it didn't matter, my mind has once again delivered me to that one question, forever to roam in my mind: Why am I here?  
  
"...Heero..."  
  
Who? Turning, eyes darting here or there, trying to pick out the speaker I wonder who is here? Who has my mind cooked up to be in this wondrous looking place with me? "Nani?" Well, I guess that's better then the customary 'Hn' I was about to grunt out. Speech isn't my forte.  
  
"~Turnaround...~"  
  
The voice comes again, closer this time. So I turn, thinking him behind me, and see no one. I know the voice though... the smooth timbre, the rich depth... I know, and yet I'm having trouble placing it... It is a dream after all, they're not all meant to be crystal clear, from what I can recall about researching them long ago.  
  
Looking harder, seeing no one I decide its time to sit down, to rest and just listen. Walking to an off colored green bench I do just that, leaning into it's back, closing my eyes to listen to the sounds around me. The birds singing, children laughing, parents lightly scolding little ones...My mind drifts back to days I try hardest to leave locked up in the small area in my mind, never to be touched unless darker dreams come, darker things that have the power to dredge up those memories. There's times when I can't remember half of why I locked them away in the first place...  
  
It is while I'm searching that place, tiptoeing around in its darkness that a certain memory jumps out at me, threatening to bite me in the ass if I don't move.  
  
And then I remember.  
  
I remember a reason why I locked some of them away... I remember whose voice, a voice I had not heard since that day on the ship... so many back... As I open my mouth to reply, to seek the question that would gain me my answer... I'm shocked when something else exits my mouth instead, "~Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming around...~" What the hell was that?  
  
Next thing I here is a light chuckle, almost amused and sad, at my mental questioning. "~Turnaround...~" I don't move now. There would really be no point in it... no one would be there, only that voice... a voice from long ago.  
  
Why was my mouth peaking something other then what I had ordered it to? Was this something that happened in dreams normally? Or am I merely 'watching' something that might come in the future? Minus the missing bodies to all the voices I hear around me... I can only wonder, however, for this dream is not in my powers. "~Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears...~"  
  
If it were possible to kill my own voice, I believe I would do so. There are few who are privileged to know what my heart speaks. I at times am not even one of them, let alone in my own little world to ponder what I truly feel, what I truly want... it is not an easy thing to understand. You cannot merely just teach someone to be a weapon then throw them aside once the wars are over and hope they will understand the non-weapon side of themselves just finely. I was lucky enough Duo wanted to keep me with him, to have him show me, help me, understand some little bit of that side of me... it's helped.  
  
"~Turnaround...~" the sweet, light, baritone voice speaks up, seemingly closer to me, just a few yards off to my right...  
  
Will I ever seem them again? With this change will the others be in my future more often? One makes their own future don't they? So adding them into it shouldn't be hard... in theory... They are my family... and by the Gods I miss them... I think... "~Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by...~" I think sometimes that the years will slip on by before I ever see them again...  
  
Smiling a little I nod, just before that voice speaks again, even closer then before, as if they're sitting right next to me, "~Turnaround...~"  
  
I don't though, turning around, there's nothing there to see. I think about that though and can tell even in my own words there's a double meaning in them. It's strange, I've never had a chance to catch that in most cases, rarely have my words every meant more then they're front value. 'Turnaround', as he says, I could... But like I said, there's nothing there. Turning around could mean looking in the past. But the only thing there are memories, some darker then night, bloody, cold... others warm, bright, ones I hold close...  
  
Then the other meaning to my not turning around; there would be nothing behind me... but I imagine, if I can picture it just right... just how it was all those long months ago... If I can see it then maybe... maybe I can see it now... What did Duo say? Something about me exercising my imagination? I think now, would be a good chance to try that...  
  
Things change... with change comes new things... new feelings... I have a change coming up, my heart tells me this. Tells me I both need this change and crave it, and yet that scares me just ever so much for not knowing what's going to happen... And still, still I will plow on like I've always done. Beasts, animals, don't run until they know they've been bested...  
  
Taking a deep calming breath, trying to focus the picture in my minds eye I slowly sit up, carefully turning my head to the side, letting my eyes slid open as my mouth speaks again on it's own, "~Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes...~" I'm not surprised. I should be. I should be very startled to see what I do now, but I'm not. Maybe it's because I pictured it first, or perhaps because I *needed* to see this? Either way it doesn't matter. Will this be my change? Is this my future? I feel I have a long road before I reach it...  
  
Sitting there, next to me, serenely as the last time I had seen him, is a perfectly slim body, sun kissed golden skin hiding strong compacted muscles with elegantly long limbs; his flight suit hugging him like a second skin, legs drawn up to this chest and arms wrapped around them leaning back against the bench, watching me. Those endless depth, all knowing onyx eyes regarding me with familiarity... even... even some warmth? They sparkle lively underneath the sun's light, his cheeks hold a bit of color to them, but I cannot be sure if that is from the sun or my imagining him as he might have been right after the battle, but with sitting in the overly large observation room...  
  
It's him... He looks freer, like some weight has been lifted from his shoulders... I wonder what that was? If I'll ever see him again to find out, or if he'd tell me.  
  
Smiling a little, sadly, it strikes me hard, at some point in my chest... I miss him. Like with the other three, I miss them all... But... yet something... something remembers him more clearly then the others... something feels different with him...  
  
He smiles, tilting his head a little to the right regarding me as his loose hair fans out on both sides, creating him a small shield from others had we been able to see them, "Heero..." carries on the wind from his lips that didn't seem to move, never changing from the small smile.  
  
I want to reach out to touch him, to reassure myself he's there in some form, that I didn't merely conjure him up from my mind. And I do, find myself in the next instant reaching for him, barely trying to touch his shoulder before... it's gone.  
  
.  
  
~ * ~  
  
'  
  
Shooting up in bed panting, I swear quickly, throwing the covers off to sit on the end of the bed, not at all worried about waking up Duo. He sleeps like the Dead. Chuckling at that I guess there's more then one reason he's called Shinigami. heh Go figure.  
  
"Wufei..." I whisper, barely on a breath moving towards the windows to gaze outward. Wufei... Why would I be dreaming about him? And now of all times? Now when I'm not sure even what will happen... glancing towards the clock I see it's nearly three in the morning... Today. I don't know what will happen today, yet I'm dreaming of someone I have not seen in nearly a year. Is this supposed to mean I might see him soon? I've read somewhere that dreams are able to predict the future at some points... I can only wonder if this is what mine will mean, with this change that shall be coming...  
  
Rubbing hands over my face exploding a breath I turn quickly and start gathering things to my chest, exiting the room quietly. Swiftly I cross to the other hallway to the second shower and make short work of getting clean, waking up... Coffee would have to wait. I would take no chance waking Duo... he deals with hyper children on a daily biases, he needs his sleep.  
  
Moving from the bathroom to the kitchen I throw a few thins together, making Duo some lunch while I'm at it before sneaking just as quietly back to the bedroom, digging out the new suitcases Duo had gotten some time before hand. With the precision of the soldier within me I load them with all my meager belongings, leaving only a few choice things for Duo to find, things he will understand... I can write him an e-mail once I figure on where I'm going, where I'll settle for the next time being.  
  
Packing finished I trot off back to the living room snatching up the food supplies in one hand, my suitcase in the other, heading out the door and... Where? Hn. Hadn't thought that far...  
  
Usually I walk to work, Duo walks to his work, it's right around the corner... mine is a near twenty mile walk. Thinking quickly, whether it would do him more justice or myself... I nod, heading off for a darker looking part of town... Given that nearly any part of town looks dark at three in the bloody morning - I've been around Duo too much - I head to the small storage locks there.  
  
Stopping at the entrance, ignoring the inquisitive look the handler gives me, barely lifting and dropping a shoulder back at him I reply, "Yuy, Heero", nodding in a good morning fashion he takes my electronic key unlocking the door a ways down for me and effectively dismissing me. He knows, this will be the last time I'll come here. I did not ask for the key back. Again, there's no need for it, there's nothing left in the block once I get to it.  
  
Walking down, a determined stride back in my steps I feel a slight tingling in my spine I hadn't felt in much too long... the feel of a mission coming on. Smirking I stop in front of my rented block, smirk widening ever so slightly at the gleaming midnight blue vehicle winking back at me.  
  
It's been too long... was my only thought while rounding the vehicle, making sure nothing is amiss with it. As always, there's not. Death would be the only option for someone messing with my baby. Woo, wonder who would think I had issues on that thought. I have two babies at this moment, my truck, a vintage Dodge Ram 2500, four-wheel drive, equipped with a ten inch lift kit, a Dixie air horn (compliments of Shinigami Inc.) and a sparkling chrome roll bar on the back with KC lights. Not to account the few *cough*illegalextras*cough*.  
  
Climbing into the cab I start her up, listening to the engine purr as it had back in her own day. Flicking on the lights, gunning the massive engine once more and I'm out of there heading back for the apartment. I wasn't kidding when I said when I left, that chair was coming with me. If anyone thinks no one can remove a chair of that size from the apartment without waking it's lone resident... then they don't know Heero Yuy very well. I will lower that thing into the back of the truck from the window if I have to. Point in fact is, it's going with me.  
  
Other fact is... Marcus was up down stairs and agreed to help me. I'm not a 'people person' by far, yet there are a few that have managed to get under my skin, nearly like Duo has been able to do. Marcus is a young man of about twenty-two, 6'3', built to either play basketball or football, I've asked him a few times why he didn't play... he just laughed good naturedly saying an old knee injury from when he was younger kept him afraid of trying out. I could understand his reasoning.  
  
An hour later I was thanking him and wishing him well with few words then preceded to head down to McKenzie's Fishin' Wish... an odd name if ever I've heard one, but that is what the dock I work at is called. It's an import station, nearly anything of all types go through there, 24/7.  
  
It's not my shift at the moment, obviously, but I know Danny will be here, and he is the one I need to be seeing at the moment. Seeing the looks thrown my way for driving in, instead of walking - I bet anyone half the guys didn't think I could drive - I secretly grin and stroll up the long stairs greeting the few I know well enough.  
  
It doesn't take long explaining as best I can my reason for leaving. He tries to get me to stay, and I might have, had there not simply been something else calling to me, something else I had to see to and now. Wishing me well, assuring my place should I ever decide to come back I bow, thanking him as much as I can for his honor. There are not many men left like Danny. Once more thanking him I slip from the office, throwing a few last farewells to those I know before heading back to my baby and driving away.  
  
Honestly, I don't know where to go. This land is wide and free...  
  
I did have a thought about Relena earlier, how Duo sounded like her... I guess it couldn't hurt - much - to go see how she's doing. A surprise inspection. Chuckling at that, trying to use my unused imagination to imagine what she'd look like seeing me show up on my own of no one's bidding... let alone untold of coming... I head to the nearest airport to proclaim a transport for myself. One that is set for both land and space, I have a feeling I'll be needing one soon... though I know not how soon.  
  
In the back of my mind, almost as if a part of me is stuck in the park dream, I can hear Wufei's soft, sweet voice whispering to me, "~Turnaround, bright eyes...~" His words reminding me of that day, six months back in the observation room, of how my eyes looked in the reflecting glass, clear and bright.  
  
Not even aware I was speaking to myself... or perhaps I wasn't, maybe that part of my voice was back in the dream as well, the part that answered him, voice just as soft, a hint of determination in it, "~Every now and then I fall apart...~" as if I had just realized how true the words were. Every now and then one did have to fall apart. If not just to fall and see what pieces were strong enough to survive and which ones needed strengthening...  
  
I suppose this was my falling apart. My piece, which needed to be strengthened, and to do that, I needed to be alone again. Duo had his own. He'll find something else, someone else... I think it's fated we would part... Find new pieces to support and strengthen the weak.  
  
Suck up your forces Relena...  
  
The Japanese Inspector's coming to town...  
  
Letting my lips curl into a smirk, bordering on small smile I flip on the radio and keep driving. It would take a while yet to get where I was going, proclaim a transport and be on my say to Sanq... This time however, I felt lighter about going then I normally do... this was something I needed... a good thing...  
  
A change...  
  
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~oOo~ * ~oOo~ * ~oOo~ * ~oOo~  
  
'  
  
Alrighty! There's the second installment of "Space Chances" ^_^ Hope y'all liked it! heh I admit, Heero's POV wasn't that easy to do... I think I have an eaiser time with Fei's to be truthful... I kept getting sort of Duoish in parts there... but guess that's okies since Heero was living with him for a long while eh? ^_~  
  
Okies! Lemme know how it goes and I'll go get started on the next one! ^_^ I hope no one kills me for working on this and none of my other stories, though I did get some of GWSS7 done, so no one can quite kill me on that one yet. ::laughs grinning:: Though I still seem to be an open target on the other seven stories or so ::sweat drop:: I'll work on 'em! I swear! But this just kicked me in the ass with enough ideas to keep it going, so until I get stuck on it, I'm stickin' to it! ^_^ Take care peoples!  
  
Keep it kickin'!  
  
~ Anime Redneck  
  
'  
  
The Certifiable Songfic Queen  
  
Warai no Megami  
  
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	3. Chapter 3: Hopes and a New Setting

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~ Space Chances 3 ~  
  
By: Anime Redneck  
  
8-18-03 ~ 9-30-03  
  
'  
  
Archive: At meh sites, TDTA & SOGOA, an' FF.net... If'n ye like ta 'ave it, then please ask meh! All ye othas with prior permission ta archive it, go right ahead!  
  
Pairings: hmm if ye donno know wha they beh, ah feel sorra for ye ::smile-smirk:: Tis a surprise, ah'd like ta think, but if'n ye must kno' ah tell ye: 2x1, 5x1.. an' ye can guess at it. ::grins widely laughing::  
  
Disclaimer: I donna own tha Guys.. nor do ah own "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler... but ah do own tha story plot an' Cathal McCree and Geiléis.  
  
"~Lyrics~"  
  
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~oOo@oOo~  
  
'  
  
That was it.  
  
It was over; He was gone.  
  
Wasn't it amazing how fast someone could pack everything they own (admittedly not much at all), load their suits and be gone even before you make it to the corridor?  
  
Seeming in the blink of an eye, they were gone. Who knew when I might see them again? It could be days, months, Ancestors forbid, years even. I do not think I would be able to last that long, in waiting to see Him again. Yet I could not stop Him from going... it was something he needed... This much I know, and understand.  
  
A man needs his space to think, explore, and experiment in new things... It is never an easy path in finding where one belongs in life, to do so takes great amounts of courage. I wish Yuy well in his search. May the Fates see fit to reunite us in the near future.  
  
Sighing, sitting once more in the bleak observation room, watching the fading smoke trail from a departing shuttle, I wonder what is to become of me now?  
  
Preventers are offering a nice package. One many would surly accuse me of being "nuts" not to accept. However, that would mean being back in the thick of things - regardless of how small... and I do not wish to be back in such a situation. I refuse to think of this as running away! Chang Wufei does not run away. I am a Scholar. I was never meant to be a Warrior, and yet, even so, it has become a way of life the last two years for me.  
  
I believe now that there will always be fighting of some kind going on; fighting we will never be rid of. I refuse to become a part of that.  
  
The Preventers work against upcoming threats to the fragile peace we now have. This is honorable work to become part of. I would fault neither a man nor woman for joining such a team... it is just not for me... Perhaps... something smaller in the way of prevention? Maybe there is something out in the way of a downscaled organization I could become part of and help. I believe I could be content enough with that. To help a smaller area in need...  
  
There was a place once mentioned in passing some time ago, of being in the most dire of circumstances: gangs running wild, towns in despair, people in need...  
  
I could thrive in a place such as that. To know I would honestly be helping people in need, not just someone who became wrapped up in another's making... Sighing, lowering my head, I wonder if we are not all just playing to another's tune? Will there not always be someone, somewhere, doing one action or another that will affect another person, if not many?  
  
Slouching in the semi-soft padding of the window seat, I watch my eyes reflection flickering in the dim light, noticing how they appear brighter then normal in the star's light.  
  
"~Turn around bright eyes...~" I had murmured half asleep as the body close to mind had stirred, shifting away from me. I had only wanted to see his eyes, one last time, and yet... he would not meet mine, refused to lift his chin and give me a parting gift... to see those ever-bright eyes glimmering for me. Oh how I secretly loved to watch them sparkle in rooms light, the day or stars own lighting... They are a beautiful shade, as deep as the endless seas, and bright as the skies fading navy blue.  
  
I suppose I should be content with what he did gift me though. I had nearly thought I had not heard him correctly. His back was hunched over just so much from his wounds the stubborn ass refused to get looked at, except for my poking and prodding to tame the worry in me... hmph. Gojo na baka Heero Yuy. His right arm he hugged close to his side as he walked away from me, stopping briefly as the door slid open, eyes turning back to glance at me whispering, "~Every now and then I fall apart...~" I hadn't known when he left, what that small line might have meant. But I think, perhaps, now I do understand what he meant by that.  
  
Heero Yuy was human; he understood that now.  
  
He had finally come to connect ends together of questions that had always plagued him - I have no doubts he has more - but for now, some were answered. For example: What was his purpose in life? What was he living for? Why were they all fighting? And others...  
  
Everyone possesses questions about their lives, where they're supposed to be, what they're to do, why their here? All these are fine. Many never find the answers though. Yuy has now been enlightened with answers to his questions... perhaps a few of them at any rate.  
  
We fight because it is in human's nature to fight. To war and see who is strongest, to see which sides ideals were correct - to bring nations together. Some things, I have come to learn, cannot have a conclusion drawn without fighting - no matter how much one tries to go around such an outcome. Yuy now knew the limits his body could take before breaking, knew he was not the "invincible" Perfect Soldier to which everyone teased or thought him to be. Yuy's fighting had given him a purpose in life, seeming the only one he had: To fight and win freedom for the Colonies was his purpose, his life...  
  
A small smile tugs at my lips on my next thought.  
  
It is true... fighting is all Heero has ever known in his life, all his purpose was for... and yet now... now he has people whom care for him, love and cherish him as a friend, a brother. People he can call on when in need, or whenever he has the rare need to just speak to someone. He has those whom consider him family and understand him. Fighting the wars had changed Heero Yuy from the Perfect Soldier, to Heero Yuy, a simple exceptionally trained human soldier. He shed his Soldier exterior to let his Humanity shine through...  
  
Ahh... but the night of space grows old and my thoughts weary if they keep treading down the paths they now wonder.  
  
I have research to perform, a place to find, a new location to settle into before the next eve is to come. I have a purpose in life also. One I am still seeking, and will undoubtedly find... but until then, I have work to do...  
  
I suppose more sleep is in order before I attempt finding anything... if I do not, I fear I will have that blonde twisted-haired onna breathing down my back about unreasonable youths and stubborn fools... Chuckling I stand and head back to my quarters for much needed rest.  
  
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~ * @ * ~  
  
'  
  
It was going to be one of those nights again. The puffy man with salting hair sighed as he settled his more-then-appropriate-weight-for-his-age down into the plush darkly furnished chair. Why was it again that Rookies always had to be brash, stubborn as hell, gung ho and hearing-impaired?  
  
Honestly. Was there so much a problem that listening to your commanding officer every once in a while - God forbid everyday! - was such a demoting thing? When had following orders start meaning one was going to be seen as a 'pet' in the Rookie Ring, instead of a good officer?  
  
Giving his head a shake the kind old man sighed heavily. All be damned if he knew when things started going down the drain... But be damned he wasn't when one stupid fool got hurt for acting without thinking. It would nearly take the impossible threat of the station's colony being under a meteor shower before those kids got their heads out of their asses and started listening to their elders... As the old saying goes... "Come Hell of high water" those damn Rookies were going to learn, and learn fast who to listen to and what rule to follow, or their asses would be off the force quicker then mercury on a hot day.  
  
Ahh, but what could you do? They were young and stupid... they'd learn sooner (hopefully rather then later) what needed to be done and how. He'd only be there to, uncharacteristically, tell them he told them so. Chuckling, a smile tugging at the not-so-old-young-man's face, settling back into his seat pulling papers forward he sighed again. So much work to be done; so little competent people working for him to do it.  
  
"Chief! Hey Chief!!" a voice shouted not twenty minutes into his working, startling the poor man, robbing him of half his life expectancy.  
  
Chief Cathal McCree's1 entire body jolted as his calmly shut door suddenly flew open slamming into the wall behind it. Luckily, he wasn't a man of weary nerves and had himself back together in record time before the young rookie could notice anything; even the still twitching of his writing hand splayed across the page he had been writing on, now sporting a nice long blue slash across half of it. But damn that boy was loud!  
  
"Wha' is it Giles?" he asked, voice stern, "An' 'ave ah nae asked ye, among otha's, many times ta refrain from slammin' me door open? T'ere is such a concept as knockin'." The young redhead started to open his mouth but Chief McCree wasn't having it. "Nae excuses. Even in times of crises..." when weren't they ever in one? "...one would be reminded ta kno' before enterin' anotha's room."  
  
Taking a steady breath McCree sighed, setting aside his ruined report, "Now. Wha' a'pears ta beh tha problem this time?"  
  
Face burning a steady red the young man could feel pulsing in his cheeks, Giles had the good sense to look sheepish and not a little bit downtrodden at the news he carried from getting reprimanded. He was a Rookie, it was true, but he always tried his best to be good... There just always seemed to be something he forgot, or did, that got him a speaking to from someone higher up then he, if not a teasing comment or two from the other Rookies.  
  
Still, he liked his commanding officer.  
  
Chief Cathal McCree was a kind man in his late forties, had a slightly rounding stomach from time spent behind the desk and age catching up to him. He was Scottish, there was no mistaking it with that red hair, green eyes and accent, even the slight freckling of his face and arms; he stood a good 5'9" and was the best officer they had on the force, aside from a few choice other higher ups that Giles had taken a liking to... Someone he could look up to and hope to strive to be like them.  
  
"Erm... I'm terribly sorra Sir..." God, why did he always stutter and stop when placed in these situations? "...but there seems ta beh a problem down in the armory room, Sir."  
  
An arched brow met the question, "A problem Giles? Wha' sort o' problem?" Why did all the Rookies seem to speak in codes the "Old Ones" didn't know? He liked Giles, honestly he did. He was a smart boy, only twenty-three, was Irish, spoke with a light accent, had good manners (though they had a tendency to disappear in times of need) and followed rules as best he could. He'd be a good cop one day, but now... McCree sighed.  
  
"Yes Sir!" crisp solute. "Sorra Sir, Reddings didn't tell meh tha details just that I should get you, an' fast Sir." Tilting his head in an un-official way Giles thought for a moment. "I think... I think I heard Walters an' Smith goin' on about someone causin' a ruckus down there though..." he could be wrong, of course, but chances of that were slim to none at the moment.  
  
"Indeed." Giles nodded, waiting for orders.  
  
Walters and Smith, eh? Why did that not surprise him? The other two Rookies he had an eye on... they were bright, like Giles, yet lacked the common sense to use it in most cases. Sad really... they needed all the competent officers they could get on L2. Depressing part was - the good ones had sense enough to transfer to one of the other colonies - they didn't want to work in the "Bottoms", as their precious colony had earned the title of.  
  
Sighing once again as he stood, McCree allowed young Giles to show him the way. "Please, lead on" waving a hand before him.  
  
"Yes Sir!" turning sharply, Giles made sure everyone moved from their path so they could reach the room on the second sublevel quicker.   
  
The sounds around them grew into a mass jumble of things. People shouting, metal hitting metal, even steel, there was the sound of guns going off once or twice that had Chief McCree seeing flames.  
  
That was a No-No. A mighty big No-No.  
  
You did not fire your side arm in the building. Ever. Unless it was being taken over by terrorist. Then, and only then, was it an exception to fire a gun in the building. You didn't even attempt that with an escaping captive, you used a stun gun. That way, if you weren't good enough an aim, at least your other officers were only out temporarily with a headache when they awoke, and not missing some needed limb, or possessing a hold in their being.  
  
Louder the noises became, the higher the Scottish man's ire rose. The people shouting, talking, steel on steel... was giving him a massive bloody headache! "Oh Hola Motha, please give those brainless enough ta cause such racket sense to stop soon, or forgive meh fir tha 'ell ah'm about ta lay down..." whispering, taking deep breaths in trying to calm himself McCree stepped foot into the room in question - or tried to. There were so many bodies crowding the one entrance into the armory supply that he couldn't even see what their eyes were trained on, surly not the one supposed to be causing all this mess in his station!  
  
Well... he wasn't standing for it. He knew damn well those idiots had jobs to be doing and they were damn well going to do them!  
  
Taking his cap from it's buckled place at his side, he whapped the nearest man upside the head with it. "Wha in tha Bloody 'Ell's goin' on 'ere!?" he bellowed, taking immense pleasure in watching the forms of those currently in front of him (mostly the one his hat smacked) blocking his way, jump startled and try turning at the same time. From years of experience, McCree took a step back, not wishing to be busted in the chin again. "Ah've neva seen such gangious stupidity in one spot before! Ye've got jobs ta beh doin'! An' ah rightly suggest ye go do 'em before ye catch yerselves on yer asses without one!" waving an arm for those that turned startled, "Move on, now! Ah'll handle this!"  
  
Good Lord man... he thought watching them scatter like scolded children, Wha' in the 'ell 'ad 'em firin' off damned weapons in station!? Never were they to do that. And they knew as such! That's what pissed him off. And he was having a relatively good day so far... It never lasted. Never. He should know this after over a decade on the force.  
  
The masses cleared out quick enough, McCree picturing some with tails tucked between their legs and finding himself trying not to snicker at them all. Ohh, they were a bunch of wee babes! Heaven help him as he lightly pushed the last one away, closing the door and turning around to face his nemeses of... a mere strapping lad sitting on stacked rifle carts. A wee lad and they were causing this entire ruckus?? Well, he silently amended scanning over the boy: a wee lad with a sword.  
  
Sighing softly, head shaking, McCree took a step forward and eyed the boy once more. He couldn't be anymore then seventeen, Asian - Chinese if his memory served him rightly. They didn't see many Asian folk in this neck of Space. He had shiny, soft looking hair pulled back into a tight tail at the nape of his neck, slanted, up tilted eyes of the darkest midnight he'd ever seen, soft curving cheeks of sun kissed caramel and tight lined lips, made up the dear boys face. He was dressed in a soft gray tank top tucked into puffy white pants that were held up by a navy blue sash tied around his waist and tight ankle cuffs at the bottom; his shoulders were squared off in a defensive look, his legs folded beneath him in such a way, that if the young one needed to be afoot quickly, he could do so without problems. Currently, his hands lied in his lap, clasped together as if he didn't have a care in the world - observing his slim frame and demeanor, McCree had the thought that, maybe he didn't.  
  
Sigh. Either way, this was not the place to talk to the boy in. McCree certainly didn't pose him a threat, didn't wish to, now nor later, and the other seemed to sense this fact. Incautiously striding tiredly forward holding out his hand to the side a few seconds, McCree gave a fatherly smile. "'Ello laddie" voice soft as the years and grandkids had made it, "Will ye please follow meh? Let us speak somewhere more comfortable, eh?"  
  
Eyeing the elder man, whom seemed to be in charge of the idiots this station held and dared called 'Officers', if the way they scrambled from the room was any indication of who was in charge. Wufei smirked inwardly watching them nearly run from the room again in his mind.  
  
This man, their commanding officer, held a benevolent look about him, his smile was warm and caring, his eyes crinkling ever so much in the corners as he did so, creating small crow's feet.  
  
Blinking rapidly to rid himself of unwanted tears, Wufei's minds eye flashed several pictures of the deceased Elders whom ran his Clan, some of whom had taken care of him for short periods during his life... By the Gods he missed them all! They were his Clan, his people, his friends and most importantly, his Family. Whatever status they held did not matter, they were all held dear to him, in his heart, even if they knew it not. This man, look very much like the ones he held dear... but for his ancestry was of the Irish or Scottish decent, not his own Chinese.  
  
The young one stood gracefully, a movement, which showed his Scottish soul how much training the young lad must have been put through. Giving a small bow from his waist, a tipping of his head the lad let McCree know he was ready to follow after retrieving his white top from a rack of bunt tip loaded rifles. Smiling, a small shake of his head and a sweeping of his arm towards the door, McCree gladly led his new visitor out of the weapons room, locking it, and led the way back to his office, glaring at all those (except Giles) to look their way.  
  
Amusing. It did not go without his noticing, how quick other officers were to look their way, catch sight of something that was other then himself, and look away again. Wufei held no doubts that the man walking purposefully in front of him was giving quite the Look to his subordinates warningly. Kind and caring people always held a silent demanding side: just look at Winner. He was a perfect little Angel until some poor fool tried harming his Peace, Friends or Family... then ZERO kicked into action and the Angel transformed into a raging Little Devil - until his people were safe, then he calmed back into his Angel half - usually with a certain Europeans help, of course.  
  
"'Ere we are." The accented voice knocking him from his musing Wufei glanced up in time to see the larger man's frame covering a plate on the door stating 'McCree'. Definitely Scottish. Giving a thankful nod stepping in and to the side so the man, McCree he reminded himself, could close the door, onyx eyes took in the tasteful furnishings. An oak desk, matching dark fitted plush chair, two other lesser chairs sat in front of the desk for visitors, there was a coat rack set to the left of the door, two file cabinets to either side of the desk... There appeared to be a cadenza set along the back wall behind the desk with stacks of paperwork scattered around a single green tinted lamp, a sister to the one sitting on the man's desk; also piled high with work.  
  
Either this man was slow on getting his work done - a thought that did not sit well with his attitude, or there was more then one man was able to handle... more that, one would suspect, others could handle... But that did not seem to be the case here... Or perhaps there were others that could have done the work yet refused to... so instead of having to spend (what Wufei thought must be hours) arguing with the person to get the work done, he took it all upon himself? Honorable, if not stupid for wearing himself out... yet still an honorable action.  
  
"Please, 'ave a seat laddie. Will ye like some tea or other thin's? We've some made ah can get ye." McCree smiled, waiting for the others answer before sitting.  
  
Another small bow, shaking his head as he sat, "No thank you" his eyes roamed once more to the stacks of paperwork. Pathetic. If he was right in his assumptions, this station truly did need a hurricane of re-ordering.  
  
"Ah'm uh..." watching the older man scratch the back of his neck, obviously flustered about the happening, and a small amount embarrassed about it, made Wufei crack a small smile. It was... enduring? to see such a man of standing do such a childish thing. Something that Maxwell had a tendency to do when nervous or in trouble. Maxwell... Yuy... Damn him to hell he wasn't supposed to be thinking about him! "...Sorra fir tha otha's actions... it wasnae right of 'em..."  
  
"Understandable though, I would think, of finding someone had broken into the armored supply room..." he smirked, "A room to which there is only one door to enter thru, and a ventilation shaft that appeared small, even to me, to want to use."  
  
Finding the lad's response humorous if not a bit humbling, McCree gave another of his age-warmed smiles. "Beh tha as it may... They shouldna been firin' arms at ye!" his voice hardened with previous ire, "They could've hit ye!"  
  
The man's anger was justly placed. Those idiots firing at him could, perhaps with proper aiming, hit him. But the chances of that happening with only just Academy training to fall back on were slim to none. However, the thought that someone cared for him, even if just as a civilian in the wrong place, was strangely warming.  
  
"Do not trouble yourself on it, Sir. I can assure you, they could do me no harm." Setting his katana in the other seat, holding his arms out to the side Wufei smirked, "As you can clearly see, there is no harm done. Though, if you do not mind my recommending it; I would suggest sending half of those that were present, back to the Academy to train once more."  
  
"Indeed!" with a bark of laughter McCree slapped his leg grinning, "By meh Motha laddie, ah like ye!"  
  
The Chinese boy simply smiled in return, watching him.  
  
"Ahh... Ye donno kno' 'ow ah beh needin' tha laugh taday lad... heh, ye donno kno'..." head shaking, hands moving to collect pages placing them in the proper stacks McCree grinned. "M'sorra! Ah dinna introduce mehself!" chuckling he extending a hand, "M'ah names Cathal McCree, Chief Cathal McCree... buh ye just call meh Cathal, eh? Mr. McCree or just plain McCree makes meh feel old!" giving a wink for his comment, Cathal smiled watching the other chortle softly shaking his hand.  
  
Chuckling as he shook Chief Cathal McCree's hand, Wufei gave a small smile, noting the man's hand was nicely warm in the seeming coolness of the room. "Cathal it is then" nodding slightly, "My name is Chang Wufei of the L5 Colony."  
  
"Is it now?" Cathal raised an eyebrow at the name, his voice surprise, but no vocal of disbelief colored it, just his plain shock at hearing that name. "Well then it beh meh honor to 'ave met the last heir of the Dragon Clan then, Chang Wufei." Cathal kept his voice low and calming, knowing loosing ones whole family, let alone their Colony, must have been more then what all of Hell could think up. "Would it beh alright if'n ah just called ye Wufei? Or, would Chang beh better? M'sorra lad... we donno get ta see many Oriental people 'round these parts, 'fraid ah might beh offendin' yeh or sumthin'..."  
  
He was scratching his neck again; Wufei chuckled to his self, and fiddling with his pen while looking at him. Giving a slight shake of his head, wondering how a man of his age could act and appear a child, he nodded, "Wufei would be fine, Cathal, and to some, calling a person by their first name without consent would be seen as offence... but I do not mind if you do so."  
  
And the sentence alone told the older man that Wufei would not be kept silent if someone else choose to use his name without permission. Cathal actually caught himself hoping he was there to watch the action of the first to take that mistake.  
  
"heh Ah thank ye laddie!" slight tipping of his head, "So, can ah ask ye, what ye were doin' sittin' in our armory then?" Asking how he got to be there was a voided question. Many never knew, hopefully would never know, who the five were that piloted the massive giants known as Gundams, the machines that dwarfed the normal MS's. A special few however, had come to handle the sensitive information. People who had a hand in forming large groups, such as the Preventers, Heads of the Colonies, close friends and family to those whom had made contact with them and lived, for whatever reasons after it.  
  
Cathal fell into two of those options; he had friends higher up in the armies that fought, such as a young Lieutenant that used to work for OZ before "seeing the light of five young boys" as the good lass put it. Or one could consider his hand (among others of the older police officers whom held military background) in helping small ways to build the Preventers operations manual, so to speak. But mainly it was by his brother's cousin Noin that he knew of the "Five Wonders" Noin's playful name for them all.  
  
Observing the man's face as he thought of what may have passed his mind, the Chinese boys brows furrowed of his own thinking.  
  
It had essentially taken him longer then should have been needed to remember whom had mentioned the place in need to him - which turned out to be anywhere on L2, yet mainly where Maxwell had grown up.  
  
With Sally Po's helping him, it was a day and a half after gathering all the needed information on the station, employee's and the current situation of the surrounding area. His surprise had come in learning that Maxwell's stories of the L2 colony were dead on. He had no qualms of the unlikely chance the American was lying to him, for it was not in his self pointed code of living to lie to people... However, coming from a wealthy, up kept colony, it was startling to see that people would let such a place go to shambles.  
  
The Dragling was sure, as it was, that the only parts responsible for holding the L2 colony in Space now was the outside hauls and frames. Inside, was a literal war zone. Gangs fought over nearly every territory, spec of land - except where the people whom still held money were able to concentrate the main of the police force. It was downright despicable how people could let their homes get like that!  
  
Coming from a wealthy and well-kept colony did not deplete his understanding and knowing that if half of the wealthy owners on L2 had gotten together, they could have kept the colony in a relatively healthy shape. Could have built a few more shelters for the unlucky people without places to call home, could have saved so many more lives... By the Ancestors there were even funds to request to be helped by! And no one, not nearly enough, had even thought to ask for them - as was found out by his research. Wufei's fast flying fingers (admittedly not as quick as His hands) had only found three people whom had tried requesting help and been turned away from it.  
  
A Mr. Sandree of the Brighter Futures Learning Center and Shelter. Then a few months later by a Sister Helen and Father Maxwell from Maxwell's Church... heaving a great sigh of sadness that seemed to overwhelm him at the thought that these, were the same people who had a hand in raising Maxwell, who helped to shape his future, and had lost their lives, among the lives of innocent children when the Alliance attacked them. It seemed the only good caring people on L2 had died in either the war between the Alliance and OZ, or by the street gangs' hands.  
  
Wufei slid in his chair, leaning against the back of it tiredly, bonelessly. There was no, nor should he ever expect there to be, animosity between he and Maxwell. He trusted the American impeccably with his very life. Maxwell he could tell returned this trust, if not by saying it outright, then by gifting the Dragon - gifting them all - with the secrets of his past. Maybe that was why, in part, Wufei was sitting in a chair in the office of L2's Chief of the 38th Precinct. The thought of helping those where Maxwell grew up, to give them a chance the braided warrior had and lost, for a better future. Maybe in his own thinking Wufei had conjured up, that by helping these poor people, his own need (half of it) would be fulfilled; the other half was unsurely left in Fates gentle hands.  
  
Glancing up at the elder man whose eyes shimmered kindly, curiously, hands folded atop his desk as if it was a natural habit, had Wufei's nerves that were bunched up, tensed as if he were going into a battle, loosen and calm. Letting his own clasped hands slide to his sides absently as his muscles relaxed, Wufei leaned forward speaking, "I had come seeking the one responsible for this station" cracking a small smile from his serious look for the elder, "in the off chance I might be of some help in reforming this area. Do pardon me, Sir, but it is in dire need of transforming... more then what you or your men seem capable of."  
  
Arching a fiery red brow at the last part McCree smirked inclining his head slightly. "Indeed." The last part, for any other, would be taken as a slight to his or her training, as offense that they couldn't handle what had them put here to do. Alas, McCree did not possess an inflated ego and knew right well when he was had on something... and he, along with his men, were most defiantly had on trying to "reform" as the young man put it, this area.  
  
Having been stationed in the very same spot for the last ten years seemed a very long time all a sudden, when faced with the young man before him, offering to add his knowledge and training to fix the problem of gangs, hookers, drug dealers... everything.  
  
His men and women, Lord bless their sorry hearts, had tried their damnedest time and again to get them off the streets, in jail, in reform houses... all of it - only to be pushed back into hiding in their precinct. They were hard pressed to handle all that roamed the streets. Some Cathal remembered hearing their place compared to the rougher parts of Neo New York. He couldn't disagree there; not much had changed from times ago to the present.  
  
The plain and simple fact was that they desperately needed all the help they could get. His people were brave and held honor. They would lay their lives down to get the job done. However, Chief McCree had no intentions of letting them loose their lives while under his care. If things got too rough, they were to pull back. Normal stations weren't run this way. If things got rough, they got rough, no real matter to what was injured or lost, as long as the job was done.  
  
That. Was if you were on a regular up kept station. This, needless to say, was L2 - and one did not receive the same support as the other Space Colonies. If they lost people, they lost people. That was it. End of complaining. They could request backup 'til their faces turned blue and eyes popped out - they wouldn't get it. Everyone knew what shambles the L2 station was in and had no honestly interest into getting mixed up with it. The brave one, the ones looking for a good challenge and fight - those people came here. Bless their hearts, even those with the minimal training, knowing very well how hurt they could get on the job, but containing a pure heart that honestly wanted to help people, came once in a while.  
  
The answer Cathal had been searching for for the better part of his service, of how to clean up and restore what they could of L2 - was quite literally sitting across the desk from him.  
  
Chang Wufei of the L5 Colony. Last heir to the long Dragon Clan - could quite possibly save their small colony - with not a little bit of help. Every person in their precinct would have to go through new training, have to take a class in thinking like the Street Folk do - ruthlessly. It sounded harsh even to his own ears, to have to say what he already knew, but Cathal was a man of little illusions.  
  
What better person could you get to teach a mere building full of civilians when compared, to battle the Streets? Where could you find someone with more training then the best Military General in less then half the years? Who could you possibility get with a thought process quicker then normal; a mind that can think like and out do the best street smart gangster?  
  
You could look to the ends of the Earth and Space for such a person... but you would never find one better then a ex-Gundam pilot. To have someone with training that would make a normal person pale in color of fear, to have killed during the wars with only their seventeen years to hold them... making them hardened, ruthless soldiers... yet to still onto some hope of life and some sort of childish air among them?  
  
Ohh nae. Nae, he would not say that the Gundam pilots are in any way childish... at least, not that they would recognize any of it. Cathal was sure the only one that showed any sort of childishness around anyone else would be the pilots' of Sandrock and Deathscythe Hell. Duo and Quatre, weren't they? Yes, that braided boy with the striking violet eyes, was most definitely a child at most times; Quatre, the sweet blonde just held a childish air around him that would likely fool others into believing that he'd never known the war, had never participated in it. Bloody hell! Even been one to help his comrades *win* it!  
  
Nae. Whether the pilots showed the child that sill lived within or not, it was there... nestled right beside its pitiless soldier half. That, is what made them the best there was alive. Some called them "ruthless" and some would most certainly kick the well rounded ass of the person that dared to call a Gundam pilot such. What so divided the Gundam pilots from the "best of the best" in anything dealing with war... Was that most of them out there would do bloody *anything* to complete their missions. Even if that meant killing people that needn't have been. That. Is what lets the Gundam pilots be in a league of their own. They would no more harm an innocent then shoot their own friends. Mentally snickering Cathal added; first time meetings aside!  
  
Sobering from his wondering thoughts, sitting upright in his seat to eye the youth before him, Cathal cracked a fatherly smile for him. Perhaps it was his already being a grandfather that made him have a liking for the young man... or more so it was the courage he possessed to keep fighting even when the Eve Wars were over... This time putting his knowledge of killing/battling skills to better use - to clean up and better many lives in the darkest part of the Space Colonies. All of the Gundam pilots, he knew, would jump at the chance to do something like this if something wasn't currently holding them down.  
  
"Wufei lad... Ah canna tell ye wha' it means ta meh personally ta 'ear ye wan'ta 'elp out 'ere in our wee part o' space..." giving a soft chuckle shaking his head, "Ah kno' it might sound funny from a ol' man like mehself, but ah beh thinkin' this here is meh 'ome... may not everyone in it... but ye kno' wha' ah'm tryin' ta say lad?" he asking tilting his head slightly, watching as the Chinese youth's eyes went shady with puzzlement then shinned with an inner knowledge just gifted him.  
  
There was little in the world that had yet to be seen by people who fought in wars. Once you were in them, Ancestors disregard the 'how' of getting into them, one will eventually see all there is. It might be the places you've visited, the people you've met... To the Dragon of L5 it was the Hearts of Men, which his soul searched for, judged and learned from.   
  
Fighting had been a form of revenge for him. Revenge for his people, his Colony... his Wife, Meilan. Fighting was his way of honoring those who have died to get him where he is today - Peace. So many sacrifices had been made to assure his life was kept his own; to make sure he was able to step onto the battlefield and win their lives back... to free them from Wars grasp.  
  
During his dance with the battlefield the raging Dragon watched with open eyes the darkest of men's souls in action; had the chance to see just what Man was truly capable of... and did not like it in the least. There was however, the very few bright souls on his very battlefield that shocked the young Dragling. How could someone pure fight and still stay as such? People like Sally Po. A crazy onna with bright hopes for the future, a good honest heart with a strong will that would challenge any mans to get done what she had to in the fastest, safest way she could. Another onna, Lucrezia Noin, perhaps just as every bit crazy as the other, yet Wufei had found her to be both an honorable and equal fighter... one whom fought beside her ungiven love to make sure he did not go out and "get his ass blown off".  
  
There were others he had found like them, like himself... four others whom now held the honor of being his Brothers... his new family. Special people he would happily give his life for if it were to save their own. It was, in a sense, the deepest relationship anyone could have with another. How many people could honestly, truthfully, say they would give their life for another without any second thoughts? Without any hesitation? There were not many like this out in the world today... there would most likely not be many more... But his family was such a people... even the extended versions... Milliardo Peacecraft, the crazy old coot Howard... As hard as it was to believe in this new time of peace, with all they had been through during their training... even their Doctors, Professors and his Instructor would gladly give their lives to save them, their surrogate sons (truly not a stranger fact had been known!), if not just to atone for the Hell they were put thru.  
  
The man sitting before him, Chief Cathal McCree, had seen action in his day. Has known the horrors of fighting, has witnessed for himself the darkest parts of ones soul... and yet still, there was a bright light in his heart that had never died within the darkness... A small, honest to God happy smile lit his Chinese features as he though: There is even childness left in his warm old soul. And it was that childness which reached out to him, which made the kind grandfather of a man stumble over his words in asking for him, trying to describe what this poor colony meant to him.  
  
Wufei understood.  
  
It was not Chief Cathal McCree's home. Cathal came from another colony, another place well up kept and clean. He had been assigned to the 38th Precinct in his younger years and somehow, had grown to love the place despite the blatant darkness threatening to swallow it whole. Cathal's soul seemed to be crying out to help all those he had seen wondering the streets without a home, without family to turn to and with no shelters in sight to help them even in the smallest of ways.  
  
The Dragon of L5 was no kid. He had no illusions of his limits of what he alone could accomplish. He could not, alone, hope to better this dark colony. It had taken hours, days of thinking, pondering, what he alone could do to help this place. It had come to him (with soft nudges from crazy women) some time before to help train those that were willing. Training a few, trusting them with that knowledge to go back and train a few more... He could get many people a better martial arts knowing then all of what the Academy could ever hope to offer. It would take that and more to achieve what they all hoped to do.  
  
It would take years of work; but this would be a start.  
  
Wufei had other ideas, strings he could pull to bring in more help without problems. Knew those that would literally jump at the chance to help others in need... And he intended to pull on those strings when the time was right... after he and his new comrades had cleaned the streets up of the worst parasites. Then, and only then, would the real work begin.  
  
"Cathal" the smooth, light tenor startled the other from the stillness of his office, "Be the truth known that I do fully understand what you are trying to tell me. This is your home, and as such, it pains you to see others hurting, knowing there is no way possible now, that you are able to help them all - let alone a good small part of them."  
  
"Aye."  
  
"I shall help you - them - with the best of what I am."  
  
Swallowing the lump suddenly formed in his old throat Cathal nodded slowly, as if his head were in a jug of syrup and was hard to move, when in fact it was his emotions stilling him from commenting, from doing much of anything as the realization sunk into his mind. They had a chance. They had an honest to God, bloody chance to turn this place around! Good Mary mother of God there was a living miracle sitting in front of his old soul.  
  
"Th-thank ye laddie... Oh by meh motha, thank ye Lonán." Eyes widening at the new name for his space sent angel, Cathal smiled fully. It just popped in there, but by God did the name fit him well! Standing sharply, noticing he startled the youth and chuckling Cathal started shoving things into his satchel before looking up, wide smile still in place. "Do ye 'ave a place ta stay Lonán?"  
  
Lonán? Blinking curiously at the name, wondering just a few moments what it meant, Wufei only caught the question before shaking his head. "I have a hotel room booked, Cathal I'll-"  
  
"Nae!" snorting, head shaking Cathal was having none of that. "Nae! Ah canna 'ave ye stayin' there! Bloody 'ell man! Ye beh offerin' ta 'elp save this place from all tha damned darkness 'round it... Nae, ye beh comin' with meh!" Oh Heaven help him but Geiléis* was going to have his read half-baked for this one! At that the Scottish man's smile turned into an impish grin. This was going to be fun!  
  
The man's refusal to let him stay where he wanted blew across Wufei's feathers the wrong way just so much... like the way Maxwell's jokes tended to go. The twinkle in forest green eyes, heightened color of... excitement? on his high cheekbones, somehow managed to defuse the Dragons rising confused ire, replacing it with a sort of child's curiousness he had found blooming more and more when the thought of true peace settled home a bit more. It was the man's fatherly looks which did the Chinese youth in however... that look of kind warmth from him, the sort he only ever saw from his family, friends and his late wife. It made him feel needed again, wanted... and he found himself nodding dumbly to Cathal while picking up his katana to attach at his waist before reaching for his bag and over coat.  
  
"Wonderful! Ohhh just wait 'til ye meet ol' Geiléis! She'll 'ave a field day with ye!" laughing merrily slapping the youth on the back as his other hand held the door open, Cathal led them from his office into the front. It was early yet, he shouldn't be calling it a night for nearly three more hours, but there was much better things to be taking care of at the moment.  
  
Stopping in the middle of a rather large room with people bustling around to all corners, Cathal let out a shrill whistle that had everyone putting on their breaks, turning or craning their necks to see him. "Listen up everyone! Ah've an announcement! Ah'm leavin' early. Ah want each of ye 'ere in the morn bright an' early! We've got us some new trainin' ta beh 'ad if'n we want ta take back our 'ome!"  
  
Shocked, confused silence met his words. Then, like the striking of impending thunder, the room erupted into shouts of hope and glee. The eyes of those that had been dull and lifeless seemed to spark a new light within'... the light of hope.  
  
Winking at his small friend, Cathal led the way once more, "Come along Lonán, Geiléis beh gettin'' reade ta make dinner 'bout this time... lessa we go surprise 'er eh?" with another kind smile, a gentle little shove to his back, Wufei found himself smiling as he was led to what would be, for no known amount of time, his new home.  
  
Maybe, there truly was hope left for him.  
  
And maybe, just maybe, the rest of what he sought would also come true.  
  
.  
  
~oOo~ * ~oOo~ * ~oOo~ * ~oOo~  
  
'  
  
1. Cathal (m) - KA hul - Meaning; strong in battle  
  
2. Geiléis (f) - gyel AISH - Meaning; bright swan  
  
An' 'ere's the next chapter to SC! heh Ah beh sorra it took meh so long ta get done. honestla... Ah tried, but writin' dinna seem ta beh with meh much this last few weeks... If'n it did, it was small ideas... but as ye can see, ah did manage to get this done tonight! heh Ah'm proud, ah dinna even get ta read anything else while doing it. A great success if'n ye ask me... Readin's a great distraction for meh. ^__^;;  
  
Please review and lemma kno' 'ow ye beh likin' it so far, ne? Ah'd greatly appreacite it. Now, ah'm off ta read something a little before hittin' the sack... never mind it's 2am now. ^__~  
  
Keep it kickin'!  
  
~ Anime Redneck 


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